Root-Beer Advice

Why do I feel like I’m a twit if I take my own advice?

It’s because if I fail to take my own advice sometimes then I feel like a hypocrite, or am afraid of being called one. That’s a standard of perfection that no one is capable of that can keep people, including myself, from taking their own advice to begin with. It’s thinking good thoughts then telling yourself it’s pointless to follow through on them because you’re going to fall on your face at some point in time so why bother trying not to do that in the first place.

And that last sentence is such convoluted bullshit I do feel like a twit for even thinking that, much less living to it n the past.

So from this point forward, I’m going to listen to the advice I give myself and do my best to take it and follow through on it. I might lose my shit every now and then, fall on my ass more often than not sometimes, but I’ll always get back up and keep going. Most of all, I’m not going to worry about what ‘someone’ (whoever the fuck they are) will think of me if I fall on my face while taking my own advice. I’ve spent way too much time worrying about this ‘someone’ and I believe I’m not the only one who thinks like this.

Now, when I give out advice I don’t feel offended or anything like that if someone decides not to take it, even if they say that to my face. Because I can refrain from telling some brain-dead moron ‘well why the fuck did you ask me in the first place if you had no intention of listening to me?’ If my advice isn’t someone’s root-beer float, that’s fine because I know not everyone is into root-beer floats. And if someone tells me I’m an idiot for being into root-beer floats, I’m not going to dignify their stupidity with a response that will land flatter than a horse turd on a hot sidewalk inside their empty heads.

Think of advice as a root-beer float, or whatever drink your fond of. And be sure to tell yourself you’re not a twit if you change your drink up every now and again, or if you spill it. There’s always more advice like there is root-beer.

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